TTC Twins

I am writting this unsure that I will even click the publish button. I get enough reactions and opinions when I go grocery shopping with my 3 girls as it is now. But, here goes the big secret...

We are TTC againnn. A Miracle in the Making!

It has been three months with no luck so far and I am getting a little worried, upset, and inpatient!

But, here is the even bigger secret...not only are we just trying for another baby but...I am hoping for twins!

I have been taking my prenatals and a lot of folic acid. Folic acid alone causes a lot of multiple births. I am drinking a lot of Vitamin D milk as well. I also ordered the Convieve Easy Kit and have been taking that as well. I also invested in some very expensive PreSeed. But, it is suppose to be totally worth the money and the only lube for TTC. As if that is not enough the list goes on...I am also trying Soft Cups but I just cant seem to make it work and feel comfortable using these yet. I completed my first cycle of fertility medicines over a week ago with no signs of ovulation yet. But, it could take up to one more week so we will see! Fingers crossed! I did have a decent amount of cramps two nights ago so I was hoping to Ovulate but still nothing. So, hopefully, it was pain from having more than one egg in there! I have wanted twins since before I knew where babies came from haha

Everyone has their own opinions on if we should even have more kids let alone try for twins but
It is my life and I know what I can handle and I personally do not care about everyone else's opinions about my family size.

I have about 2 more weeks roughly to find out if we even got pregnant this cycle let alone the wait to find out just how many babies are in there! I am severely impatient!!!

It was so easy with the first two. After two years of trying, I just accepted it was not going to happen so my first was a total surprise and my second happened on the first try.
Last month I got a BFP and I was exstatic! I took 10 test and 9 all came back positive. I ran through the house jumping around and even told my parents and best friend. Only two days later I suddenly got my period. How could I have my period and have a BFP? I than started cramping too and that is when the worries came. I have had painful periods lately so I though maybe I was just one of the few who would get my period the first few months of my pregnancy. I called my doctor to get in to have everything checked out and he sent me straight to the ER with scares of an Eptopic Pregnancy. I drove alone to the hospital in panic. I could barely speak the words to the receptionist, the tears poured down my face. I am healthy and I have been taking prenatals, how could this be happening!? The nurse gave me a cup and told me to pee. She than came in the room and told me the test came back negative. I said no, I am telling you...I AM PREGNANT. The more I said it the more real it felt. They retested me with yet another negative. I pulled out multiple test from my jacket and she locked completely confused as she starred at the positive test I held in my hand. They sent me straight for blood work and told me they would call me later that day with the results. I got no call so I assumed it was negative. 4 Days later they finallllyyy called...the test came back negative. What happened!? No way I got that many false positives! I still have no true answer but my guess is a chemical pregnancy. All I know is it hurt my heart more than its been hurt in a long time!
My heart aches for all the mothers that can not have babies at all. This world is unfair and I just do not understand it! How can a mother who does not want a child and murders it become pregnant? Yet a woman who desperately wants to be a mother can not feel what it is like to have a child grow inside of you, to hold and love and care for a beautiful baby?
I can still remember the pain I felt when I was told I could not concieve on my own. I still rememeber the pain when I had a chemical and I feel the pain now of a TTC woman with BFN.
So...go ahead bring on the negative comments...Go ahead yell at me for wanting more kids...Yell at me for asking for more than one when some people can not even have one...Yell at me about the risk of multiple births...And I will pretend to care about your opinions on the matter....Hey everyone is entitled to an opinion. It is life. But I am not required to live by your opinions, belief, or way of life.